FEATURE | Story by Ilona Saari
The ‘War’ on Christmas
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Out come the carolers, the trees, the eggnog, the presents, the good cheer and, for some, that pesky war on Christmas. What is with this “war” that’s been waging for years now?
I first heard about it from that pontificating pundit Bill O’Reilly who proclaimed on Fox News that he’d been in the trenches fighting against the destruction of Christmas for over fifteen years, replacing it with non-specified “holidays.” Fox talking heads have since picked up the bayonet and have passed it back and forth among each other ever since Bill-O flamed out at the network. These torch-carriers mantra, “Christmas will not be replaced!”
As I see it, some people and politicians are still agitated and agitating, but there seems to be no marauding armies, not even a self-proclaimed militia, marching down the Main Streets of American ready to do battle against Christmas (or Christians who celebrate). Most folks are simply trying earnestly to be politically sensitive when they refer to a season’s decorated tree as a holiday tree or wish folks Happy Holidays. They’re being inclusive. Take that Rhode Island governor a while back who once called the tree in his own house a “Christmas tree,” but the tree in the “state” house a “Holiday tree.” The PC tip-toeing may seem silly to some, but a war? Please! For all you ‘war on Christmas’ folks’… doncha know, it was actually the Pilgrims who were the ones who banned Christmas trees, Christmas presents and levied a fine on anyone who said “Merry Christmas.” Now, them’s fightin’ words! The only ones who actually started a “war” on Christmas were America’s very own Christian settlers.
Frankly, I’ve never been too sure about who was supposed to be waging this war on Christmas … so I did some research and, lo and behold, found out it was all those secular Democrats living in liberal hamlets across the land. Shame on you, seculars! You’re the ones who declared war on Christmas! You’re the ones who ripped the Nativities out of our town squares!
Wait. I’m a secular Democrat! But I’m also a mainstream Protestant and I haven’t declared war on Christmas, nor has any secular Democrat (Christian or otherwise) I know. Come on, I played Mary once in my Sunday school Christmas pageant (I think I was nine) and the town I grew up in back in the day never had a Nativity in its town square (to be honest, we didn’t even have a town square, but I digress…). We had them inside or in front of our churches where they belonged. But, because these talking heads said “we” started this war, I decided to check out my little liberal-left-leaning, Southern California hamlet to see if they were right.
The first thing I noticed was that some of our local parking lots had morphed into Christmas tree lots. Hmmm — not “holiday” tree lots? I decided I better check this out.
So, after I drove around the county, checking out its Christmas tree lots (I know they’re Christmas tree lots, because the signs told me they were), I found myself at a Holiday Open House on one of America’s “Main” Streets. Uh oh, now they’ve done it. “Holiday” Open House? Those secular Democrats may not have declared war on our Christmas tree lots, but they had taken over the street. Occupy Santa Lane!!!
Speaking of holiday, did you notice how some folks get into a real dither when they hear “Happy Holidays?” It seems we are eliminating baby Jesus when we wish someone “Happy Holidays” even if baby Jesus isn’t in someone’s belief system. It’s the crux of their war on Christmas. Though why so many of those ranting about the war on Christmas write “Xmas” for “Christmas” (which is literally eliminating “Christ”) is a puzzlement to me, but I digress, again.
I wonder if those talking heads think that Bing Crosby was a secular Democrat waging war on Christmas all the way back in 1942 when our country was in the midst of WWII (a real war) and he sang Irving Berlin’s little ditty in the classic “holiday” movie, “Holiday Inn” titled “Happy Holiday?”
Happy Holiday
Happy holiday, happy holiday
While the merry bells keep ringing
May your ev’ry wish come true
Happy holiday, happy holiday
May the calendar keep bringing
Happy holidays to you
Maybe they’re giving Der Bingle a pass for such heresy. Bing did sing “White Christmas” after all.
But wait, here I was at the Holiday Open House amid all kinds of pretty Christmas trees (remember, we know they’re Christmas trees because the lots we buy them in tell us they’re Christmas trees) and there were beautiful Christmas wreaths (from those Christmas tree lots), and tons and tons and tons of Christmas decorations – not Hanukkah or Kwanzaa decorations. Even the halls of the Arcade were decked!
Oh, and there were carolers strolling up and down the street singing, yup, Christmas carols! I do see the word “holiday” – but I also see the word “Christmas.” Don’t the townspeople in our little liberal hamlet know there’s still a war on Christmas going on?
I’m sure they do, but they know it’s a faux war. Or maybe they believe, like I do, that real religious symbols belong in and on churches, temples and mosques of worship. They do not belong in a town square which is supported by everyone’s tax dollars (even atheists’). That’s not declaring war on Christmas – it’s declaring civility in a diverse, civil society.
And one last thing – this ridiculous war on Christmas they use to promote their own political agenda trivializes the real wars we fought and the devastating war going on in Ukraine. It diminishes those men and women fighting for freedom, including religious freedom.
But, like Bing Crosby sang, it’s the holiday season… Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and, of course, Christmas.
“May the calendar keep bringing…Happy Holidays to you.”
Always enjoy your digressions! They make me laugh, as does your take on the War on Christmas. Let me know when the war is over and pass me a Christmas cookie (not a holiday cookie!)
SPOT ON!! And JOYOUS YULETIDE to all (that REALLY pisses people off lol)
As always, I so enjoy Ilona’s stories!! Always fabulous!
As always, I so enjoy Ilona’s stories. Always fabulous!